The critical moments of the Triduum, for which we have been preparing all Lent, are almost upon us. And in today’s Gospel the villain in the drama appears exposed, although we had the foreshadowing two days ago when he complained about wasting all that expensive oil on Jesus.
Judas was only revealed as traitor at the last moment. The gospels with hindsight impute base motives and dishonesty to him.
But I’m rather sure it was not that simple.
Like the other Apostles, Judas would have been called, invited by Jesus, with hope for his conversion.
You can be sure when Judas signed on with Jesus, Judas loved Him just as much as Peter did.
Judas trusted too much in himself, his thinking and judgment, the way he would have done things as God. He was selfish and self centered. But of course the other apostles were too; and we see them constantly in the Gospels bruising their egos against the hard reality of Jesus.
But something went radically wrong Judas. Instead of being turned into a new creation, he hardened and his love soured into anger, cynicism and perhaps hatred.
He ultimately didn’t have the love that Peter had for Jesus the person; Peter who from love rushed in where angels fear to tread and made a fool of himself, cutting off a servants ear and a few hours later denying Jesus in front of other common servants. Judas love was not for the person but for what Jesus could do for him, for the nation. And when Judas perceived those dreams of his betrayed, He betrayed Jesus.
You and I may never know if we have all it takes to be a Peter, who honestly stumbled or a John who never wavered. But we can have, can work on one necessary thing… selfless love.
It’s not easy, but it’s doable. Jesus is our model, our guide.
But Judas, Peter and John and prove that we too have what it takes to be any of them.
May our Lenten prayer and penance, may our reverent observance of the Triduum, bind us closer to the person of Jesus Christ in a more genuine, selfless love
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